Your dad has started eating dinner and Miko kept coming up to him. I wasn't able to get Miko from dad because Ate wanted to comb my hair and wouldn't let me stand up from my chair in front of the TV. In short, dad got mad because his "nightly routine" got effed up.
He always says "may routine na kasi ako pagdating sa bahay" and that routine shouldn't be swayed. Maybe that's my problem. I couldn't understand routines because I don't have one. Maybe if I had a routine, I wouldn't have to eat while spoonfeeding 2 kids and breastfeeding another one all the same time. Maybe if I had a routine, I could have more than 2 hours of uninterrupted sleep at night.
Maybe routines and parenting don't mix. Routines suck. Hormonal imbalance sucks. I wish I slept earlier last night to prepare me for this day.
Sorry for the rant. I really just wanted to let it out. In retrospect, I think I'm really just jealous of how your dad can manage a routine, find time for his games and interests, etc. Not that I'm regreting the time spent with you. I just wish I had more time for me, to learn, to be quiet for more than 10 minutes, to bathe and poop without being rushed. Maybe things will get better when you're older and you can do more things on your own.
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| Who wouldn't have a heart attack? Disclaimer: more precarious positions were not photographed due to transient hypertension attacks. |
I love you kids. I love your dad too. He just gets on my nerves sometimes. Some times more frequently than normal. Hay. But I love him nevertheless.
