- No social media -- no Facebook, no Instagram
- No rice at dinner
In addition to 2nd item above, I also starting using the stairs more. There are days when I feel this is chickenfeed. There are days when I am almost tempted to call your dad to fetch me at the stairwell because it feels like my chest is going to explode!
Fasting from social media gives me instant gratification. I was able to zero out my unread non-work e-mail on the first day! I also started reading new books, watched a classic drama, and focus on work. Most importantly, though this still needs consistency, I am able to focus on the NOW.
- I feel proud when people compliment Miko when he eats on his own.
- I feel proud when I see Ate confidently join games at a party.
- I feel proud when Kuya is commended by his therapists, or when he insists to do things on his own.
- I went to the grocery with lolo, and noted that his face has indeed aged.
I am happy to see you all grow up to be your own individuals -- you are starting to show your own quirks and traits, and I couldn't wait for you to be old enough to have mature conversations with me and dad. At the same time, I worry that time is slipping by so fast and I may be missing out on a lot of things. Please help me and remind me always that time spent together is the most important gift I can give to you. I love you guys. I hope I am able to fill in your memories with happy thoughts and love to last you even after I am gone.
On another note -- I love it when Ate asks me "Mommy, happy ka sa akin?" I started praying like that now. "Lord, happy ka ba sa akin?" I feel like I am trying to please a lot of people, but the One whose approval I should really be striving for is God's.
Love you Guys! Watch out for a healthier me :)
