30 years from now

So I was thinking that every family should have the following:

- a doctor. So that someone can explain medical conditions and give sound advise (and debunk superstitious beliefs!) to the rest of the family.
Are you up to the challenge, Dr. Dahlia Felize Deves, MD? I'll leave the specialization to you. Put in as many initials after your name as you can alright? Take care of your dad and kuya and explain processes and medicines to them when I am no longer around. Ease their worry and their fear of hospitals and medical procedures. I entrust to you the wellbeing of these two men in our family.


- a priest. But since we're thinking big, can we have a Pope? His Holiness, Pope Jeshua Khalel Deves sounds really good to my ears. (Your choice for the Pope name, but remember I adore Pope John Paul II) You have always been dad's and my anchor to God. Please be the light of this family and guide your siblings towards God too. I can be your secretary, son. Just promise to take me to the Vatican and the Holy Land please. :) You can be the first blind Filipino Pope!

- someone needs to be a lawyer too. To explain the law and, again, give advice to everyone. This is my second choice for the both of you. :)

Then again, you can always be what you want to be -- businessman, office worker, mechanic, painter. So long as you are happy and you can provide for you and your family's needs, I can die happy. I vow to try and expose you to all possibilities and options you might want to explore, and support you in whatever path you want to pursue.

I love you both so much! :)

Do You Enjoy Financial Freedom?

How do you say you enjoy financial freedom? Here is a simple test that I heard from Bo Sanchez' Truly Rich Club ---

"Suppose you lost your work today. How many months can you stay unemployed without being bankrupt?"

Something to consider when you plan your finances right? Let me know your thoughts. Love you both!

I need to go to Singapore

Hi Kids,

Even before Kuya Aki was born and dad and I aren't married yet, people have been telling me that I should leave the Philippines and work in Singapore, just like your Tito Pangke.

I've always refused the idea. Who will stay with lolo and lola? What will I do if something happens to them? When Kuya was born, then Iya eventually, I became more adamant. I don't want us to be an Overseas Filipino Worker (OFW) family. I don't want to see you grow only through video calls. I don't want to be separated from dad for a long period of time. And I guess a part of me don't want to since I'm scared. Scared of being alone, scared of starting anew. 

But, Singapore is a disciplined country. I love that I can envision Kuya commuting on his own. Sure there will still be mean people who will trick him, but still, I think it is a much more amenable country for PWD than the Philippines will ever be. If I don't go now and wait for the both of you to grow up considerably, I might miss the chance to get good employment given my age by then. If not now, then when?

Sorry Iya, if you do realize that we're moving mostly for Kuya. But I know you love your Kuya and understand that we want the best for both of you. I'm sorry Kuya if you realize that I fear for you. I know you understand that as a mother, I will always fear for you and Iya.

I prayed and consulted wiser people about this choice. We may need to part ways now but I promise to do everything not to make this separation longer than necessary. I continue to pray that this is God's will for our family. I claim blessing and an immediate reunion for our family.

Love you both so much!

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Here is the daily reflection that piqued this post:

Are your prayers in accordance to His will?

Lord, thank You for revealing Your will for me. I entrust to You all my needs, and even things for my enjoyment, in Jesus' name.

Lolo and lola

I admire lolo and lola for being so gracious amidst the ruckus that dad and I had this week.

I know they were hurt with what happened, but they didn't meddle. It takes trust in your dad, strength in holding back, and wisdom and faith in knowing that everything will turn out okay in the end.

They served food and forced dad and me to eat together, and in small gestures such as that, I know, that even without words, they were trying to patch things up. I am relieved that they did not just blindly take my side, and that we did not have that awkward air in the house for long.

For these and much much more, I am grateful and feel extremely blessed for my mom and dad. Love them immensely when you grow up.

A good prayer

Lord, I have no doubt that You know my needs even before I realize I have them.

Hypocrites Are Welcome

In today's First Reading, we continue to read from the Letter to the Hebrews' treatise on the priesthood. We are reminded that we have such a High Priest in Jesus who is "holy, innocent, undefiled, separated from sinners and higher than the heavens"(v.25).

A story is told of a priest who bumped into a parishioner who had not been attending Mass for quite some time. When asked why she had not been going to church, she snapped back, "Because our parish church is full of hypocrites!" The priest smiled and proposed, "Why don't you come next Sunday? We still have room for one more."

Why do we go to church and listen to God's Word? We go to Mass not because we are holy. On the contrary, we go to church because we need to be forgiven, to be reminded of His Word, to be strengthened by His Body and Blood. Let us not forget, the Church is not a museum of saints. The Church is a hospital for sinners.

May I propose a remedy for this tendency towards skepticism and discouragement? Let us not judge the effectivity of a medicine through those who do not take it. In the same vein, let us not judge the holiness of the Church through those who have fallen short of the standard. As the wise saying goes, "Do not leave Jesus because of Judas."

Surely this is not a justification and we should continue to be indignant when priests and Christians give Christianity a bad witness. The duty to live up to the dignity of our calling remains. But we maintain that the Church is holy not because of the priests and its members. The Church is and continues to be holy in spite of erring priests and members because our High Priest is Jesus, "holy, innocent, undefiled, separated from sinners and higher than the heavens."

This is surely good news and a guard from discouragement. Fr. Joel Jason

REFLECTION QUESTION: Have you alienated yourself from the Church because of erring Church members? Know that, in the end, you are the one who stands to lose.

Sorry

I'm sorry for last night. You shouldn't have had to witness that and I'm sorry because I should have been able to shield you from experiences like that. I should have taken it outside, where lolo and lola might have heard it, but you wouldn't. I'm sorry for the raised voices, the pushing and pulling, but mostly I'm sorry for the negative vibe and lack of love into our room, which is supposed to be a haven for both of you -- a place where you should feel most safe and loved.


I'm sorry for being weak, I'm sorry for fighting back, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. This is not a proud moment for me as a mother, as I failed to shelter you from stuff like that.

I don't know what will happen or if things will go back to how they were. But what I know is that something changed, something within me. I can't say it's for the better, but last night definitely ignited a sense of constant vigilance within me.

In Revelation 21:4, it is said that God "will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be... any crying, or pain". Until then, please stay with mommy. You two are my life, and to lose you will cause my death.

I love you both.

Some notes on jealousy

If you have a problem with jealousy, you have a problem with God, not the other person.

What you have is because of God's grace. You might think, it's because of your strength or your education. But the moment God takes away that grace, all you have will be worth nothing. For example, you might think it's your strength making you great in sports, but the moment God takes away that grace and you get injured, you get nothing.

Jealousy doesn't mean God is not good to us, it only means we are not grateful for God's blessings

Your inheritance have been secured. You can rejoice with the blessing of others because you are confident that your portion is already waiting for you.

Courage

Reflection: God calls every single one of us to do His will. Have you freely opened your heart and soul to His voice?

Lord, grant me the courage to say yes to Your call and the faith to strongly believe that You are with me every step of the way. Amen.

Choose To Be Clean and Healthy

Jesus stretched out his hand, touched him, and said, "I do will it. Be made clean." – Luke 5:13

In December 2011, I had the privilege of interviewing people who were healed through natural and alternative healing methods. Many of them simply changed their eating habits — from an "eat anything" diet to a plant-based one.

One was a pancreatic cancer survivor who drinks guyabano tea as her water. Another one drinks pure, fresh calamansi extract every morning as his maintenance for a stronger immune system. From near-death, most of them are now enjoying their second lives.

But what I realized from their stories is that our health is in our hands — not in the doctors'.

We can choose to be healthy or unhealthy, depending on what we put into our bodies. And this is what I am guilty of. Although I try to eat less meat and more fish and fruits, I still do eat a lot of sweets and chips, and drink soda.

But as the Lord said to the leper in the Scripture passage today, "Be made clean," I believe that, with God's grace, I can make a turnaround.

So for this year, I promise to myself and to the Lord that I will nourish myself only with healthy food, not only physically but also spiritually, emotionally and mentally. -- Tess V. Atienza (svp_tvatienza@yahoo.com)

Reflection: What do you want to be healed of? Ask the Lord to heal you.

 Lord, I present to You my unclean self. Make me clean again.

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This is a lesson for mommy, too. I need to strive and live a healthier lifestyle so that I can spend more years with you. I love you, kids!

YOUR INTERNAL IMAGE IS IMPORTANT

A wild angry dog wandered off to a cave full of mirrors. Seeing the many reflections surrounding him, he barked at each of them. Seeing that each reflection barked back at him, he ran out of the cave, saying, "This is such an angry world I live in!"

A domesticated pet dog wandered into the same cave of mirrors. Seeing the many reflections around, he smiled and wagged his tail to each of them. Each image did the same and the dog came out of the cave, saying, "It's a friendly world I live in."

Moral of the story: What happens without is to a great extent, affected by what is happening within. If you are an angry individual, you will most probably see the world through glasses with angry shades. Similarly, a joyful individual will most probably see the world in colorful shades.

Our thoughts and expectations do influence our external state of affairs. While we do not always get what we deserve in life, we usually get no more than we expect. As the principle says, we receive what we believe.

In today's Gospel, Jesus heals a man with leprosy. A leper is rejected, isolated, stripped of his rights to community, and barred from considering himself a member of humanity. Every leper should know his place and remind himself of these as he is required by law to shout, "Unclean, unclean!" (Leviticus 13:44), whenever he finds himself within hearing distance of people.

We see none of these in the leper of today's Gospel. He resisted to be treated as one of the living dead. He boldly approached the Lord, believing within what is rightful to every believing Jew. His external circumstance tells him he is as good as dead. His internal image tells him, "I am a child of the Lord." Jesus affirmed his faith.

The Holy Book says, "Nothing is impossible with God" (Luke 1:37). God's power is unlimited; it is limited only by our lack of faith. --Fr. Joel Jason

REFLECTION QUESTION: Psychologists and sociologists teach that 20 percent of our life is determined by what happens to us, and 80 percent by how we respond to the 20 percent that happens to us. Which percentage do you allow to dominate your life?

God our Father, help me go through life with the joy and confidence of knowing that I am Your child. Amen.

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Sweethearts, you are, indeed, God's children. Don't forget that your divine inheritance is already prepared for you. God promised nothing but greatness to his followers, so be confident and follow Jesus' steps to claim it!

Isaiah 40:28-31 NIV

Do you not know? Have you not heard? The  Lord  is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.    He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.    Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;    but those who hope in the  Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

GOD IS NOT OUR RIVAL

God is not our Rival Greek mythology narrates the story of Prometheus. Prometheus came to know that the gods enjoyed fire in their kingdom and they capriciously withheld it from humans and kept it for their own enjoyment. One day, Prometheus stole fire from the gods and gave it to men. The gods became angry and they punished Prometheus for eternity by having a large bird eat up his entrails, then they regenerate and the birds come back to eat them again. The Promethean myth continues up to this day in many ways. For some people, God is a distant, uninvolved and disinterested God. He created the world and turned His back from it forever. For some, God is a tyrant whose pleasure comes from imposing unreasonable rules on His subjects. Today's First Reading addresses the latter sentiment. John reminds us: "The love of God consists in this: that we keep his commandments — and his commandments are not burdensome." When we see God from the Promethean point of view, God is a tyrant and a rival. When God is seen this way, His commandments will always be viewed as capricious and burdensome. The glory of Christianity lies precisely in the fact that the unknown God has made Himself known; the unseen God has made Himself visible; the eternal God was born into the world and became man. In Jesus, the Incarnate One, we see a God who lived out His own commandments even before He gave them out. God did not simply write a moral manual, dropped it from the heavens and left us on our own to figure it out. Blessed John Paul II put it so eloquently when he said that, in Jesus, "God introduced man to man himself." In short, Jesus, in becoming man, showed humanity how to live as a man and child of God. Jesus did not say "Go!" He said, "Let's go!" Yes, God is not our rival. He is our companion. We can trust Him and His commandments are not burdensome. Fr. Joel Jason REFLECTION QUESTION: Have you appreciated the Christmas mystery of God becoming one with us? Prayerfully and with consciousness, pray the following words: "And the Word was made flesh and made His dwelling among us. Amen!"

Relationship with God

Do you have a tendency to be utilitarian in your relationship with God? Do you go to Him only when you are in need?

Lord Jesus, You taught us to pray for our daily bread. I pray not for that which spoils and rots. I pray for the bread that is You, the bread that brings us unto life eternal. Amen.

Mercy and worship

First of all, let's talk about mercy. Mercy is something that you don't deserve but you receive it. Let me expound.

For example, your teacher caught you cheating during an exam:

     a. Your teacher gives you a grade of 0 for your exam and gives you suspension. That's JUSTICE.

     b. Your teacher gives you a grade of 0. That's MERCY.

     c. Your teacher gives you a passing grade. Now that is GRACE. :)

Despite being the sinners that we are, God has shown mercy in our daily lives. Do you agree? Now, if we know and understand that mercy, then we will be able to respond, i.e. worship, in a way acceptable to God.

The apostle Paul said it best when he mentioned that the starting point of an acceptable worship is you understanding the mercy of God.

Acceptable worship does not require preaching to thousands, singing worship songs or raising your hands in supplication. It may be done through those things, yes, but most importantly, you can worship God in the way that you live – in the mundane things like giving thanks for wisdom when taking an exam, offering a very difficult task at work, or being grateful for the people who designed a nice game that you're playing.

Remember, we give acceptable worship not because God just needs to be worshipped, but rather we give acceptable worship in view of God's mercy.

How do you worship God in your daily lives?

Inherited Traits

What traits did you inherit from your ancestors? Are they godly traits? If not, what are you doing to correct them?

Not understanding but trusting

We may never be able to understand fully the methods or motives of God; but we are not required to understand them, simply to trust them. (Woodrow Kroll)

Lord, teach me to obey You, especially during the times when I don't understand.

Have an Ambition

"Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings"

Be discerning

Do you accept everything that you hear or see as absolute truth? Be discerning lest it lead you into a trap.

Start Now

Every PRO was once an AMATEUR

Every EXPERT was once a BEGINNER

So dream BIG and start NOW

For kuya - Faith

"Faith is seeing light with your heart when all your eyes see is darkness."

Slumbook questions - mom

About Me

Real Name: KMD

Age: 28

Location: San Pedro, Laguna

Occupation: Team Lead/Systems Analyst at a multi-national company

Languages/dialects Spoken: English, Filipino, some chavacano

Favorites

Movies: I looooove movies -- Back to the Future trilogy, Prince of Egypt, If Only, The Ten Commandments, Armageddon, Mama Mia, and a lot lot more! :)

Songs: I like different genres -- the band Parokya ni Edgar, Francis M, Taylor Swift, and others more! :)

Actors/Actresses (movies and television): none in particular, I love a whole lot of them

Television Shows: I got hooked on the House,MD and CSI series before, I like cooking and baking shows (I know I don't cook much, though), as well as shows on interior design, etc.

Books: I used to have a set of the Young Folks Shelf of Books (Collier's Junior Classics 1962) but lola and I had to sell it during a difficult time during my college years. I mourn for it until now and I miss reading the wonderful stories I grew up with. My only regret is not having it still so we can read the stories together. I hope I remember some of them when we do our night time storytelling.

Sports/Games: I don't do sports much. But I like watching gymnastics and synchronized swimming. (Arte no?)

Players: when I was still in highschool, I never knew any players save for Toni Kukoc (NBA) and Vince Hizon (PBA) -- but this was not because of their basketball skills ;) when I was an intern during my last year of college, though, I saw Vince Hizon in person and was really dumbfounded! Never had the guts to approach him to take a picture or ask for an autograph, though, tsk tsk 

Food/Drink: ah, food, I looove food. During my younger, more naive years, I just have one answer -- chocolates. Now, I love 4-cheese pizza, I love pesto, I love brazo de mercedes, I love red velvet cakes, I love Mediterranean food ! :)

Vacation Spots: I'd love to travel and explore new places and things. But being born to, and marrying a homebody, I don't get to travel much. What I'd love to visit are: Egypt, Holy Land, Rome, Spain, France, Asia. For quick getaways, on the other hand, I love the hills of Antipolo, Tagaytay and Baguio. :)

Getting personal

Right now I'm reading: "Now, Discover Your Strengths" It's a pity I don't have much time to read nowadays. I used to devour books and finish them in a day or two. Shameless to say I've been reading this one for months. If it were nonfiction, I think I would have found more time to read it. :)

I'm fun loving or serious (and why): I'd say I'm more on the serious side. I grew up with a military man, so you can only imagine the restrictions I had growing up.

My dream guy/gal: is the guy I married 4 years ago ;)

My hobbies: I like reading and creating stuff -- I try my hand at cooking, jewelry making, arts and crafts, designing houses, etc. I like to conceptualize -- to imagine and create things in my head, BUT when it comes to execution, I need to leverage on other people to make sure it is created properly (most of the time, it's lolo teng who helps me through my arts and crafts stuff)

My biggest strengths and weaknesses: is my family

My best friend: is none other than your dad. He knows me, sometimes better than I know myself. (But again, as they say in the movie Titanic, "a woman's heart is a deep ocean of secrets". Hay, you know my greatest fear is to be senile ;) )

My favorite subject at school: is Medical and Surgical conditions and algebra

That one thing I want to change about myself: is my insecurities, my sometimes unforgetting/unforgiving heart 

My ambition: is hearing dad and you guys tell someone that you are proud of me, of what I have done for our family, and that you love me immensely

I go crazy about: YOU and Daddy!

I draw inspiration from: you should know by now that nothing defines me except our family <3

According to me, love is: a verb. It is something we do, not something we feel.

Given a chance to be invisible, I'd: snoop on you chikitings

If there was one person I could bring back from the dead, that would be? (and why) Lola Dely. Coz your dad loves her so much and I just want to be able to meet her and thank her for giving me a dependable husband and a loving father to my kids. I want to thank her for raising the man we have come to love as the head of our household. :)

Hope you've learned a lot about mom and dad through these questions. We love you both so much!


UPDATE (03/31/2014)

I forgot to write about it, but dad searched, found, and bought the complete set of books I was looking for for 10 years!!! Isn't he amazing? I still feel giddy remembering it. So now that we're reading those books, what is your favorite story? Give dad a kiss for me! :)

Slumbook questions - dad

About Me

Real Name: Darwin

Age: 30

Location: San Pedro, Laguna

Occupation: Employee

Languages Spoken: Filipino, English

Favorites

Movies: Action movies

Songs: Alternative

Actors/Actresses (movies and television): Many to mention

Television Shows: Many to mention

Books: None

Sports/Games: none

Players: none

Food/Drink: Many to mention

Vacation Spots: Beach

Getting personal

Right now I'm reading: e-mails

I'm fun loving or serious (and why): Many to mention

My dream guy/gal: someone who can take care of my children

My hobbies: collecting that may interest me

My biggest strengths and weaknesses: Family

My best friends: Kaye Deves

My favorite subject at school: Math

That one thing I want to change about myself: Many to mention

My ambition: to have my own house and car for my family

I go crazy about: cars, shoes, bikes, etc.

I draw inspiration from: my family

According to me, love is: Taking care of someone in many instances.

Given a chance to be invisible, I'd: I'd like to be in ladies room! 

If there was one person I could bring back from the dead, that would be? (and why) my mom, because i want her to take care of my kids and see how happy i am right now!

Toothpick test

How to check if the pudding/bread that you're cooking is ready -- stick a toothpick in and if it comes out clean then it's done :)

I love this contract drawn by Janell Hofmann when she gave her son an iPhone. I'm sure you will have access to technology far greater than what we have now, but I hope you can relate to the pointers she has listed out. Love you both!

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Gregory's iPhone Contract

12/25/2012

Dear Gregory

Merry Christmas!  You are now the proud owner of an iPhone.  Hot Damn!  You are a good & responsible 13 year old boy and you deserve this gift.  But with the acceptance of this present comes rules and regulations.  Please read through the following contract.  I hope that you understand it is my job to raise you into a well rounded, healthy young man that can function in the world and coexist with technology, not be ruled by it.  Failure to comply with the following list will result in termination of your iPhone ownership.

 I love you madly & look forward to sharing several million text messages with you in the days to come.

 1. It is my phone.  I bought it.  I pay for it.  I am loaning it to you.  Aren't I the greatest?

 2.  I will always know the password.

 3.   If it rings, answer it.  It is a phone.  Say hello, use your manners.  Do not ever ignore a phone call if the screen reads "Mom" or "Dad".  Not ever.

 4.  Hand the phone to one of your parents promptly at 7:30pm every school night & every weekend night at 9:00pm.  It will be shut off for the night and turned on again at 7:30am.  If you would not make a call to someone's land line, wherein their parents may answer first, then do not call or text.  Listen to those instincts and respect other families like we would like to be respected. 

5.  It does not go to school with you.  Have a conversation with the people you text in person.  It's a life skill.  *Half days, field trips and after school activities will require special consideration.

6.  If it falls into the toilet, smashes on the ground, or vanishes into thin air, you are responsible for the replacement costs or repairs.  Mow a lawn, babysit, stash some birthday money.  It will happen, you should be prepared.

7.  Do not use this technology to lie, fool, or deceive another human being.  Do not involve yourself in conversations that are hurtful to others.  Be a good friend first or stay the hell out of the crossfire. 

8.  Do not text, email, or say anything through this device you would not say in person.

9.  Do not text, email, or say anything to someone that you would not say out loud with their parents in the room.  Censor yourself.

10.  No porn.  Search the web for information you would openly share with me.  If you have a question about anything, ask a person – preferably me or your father. 

11.  Turn it off, silence it, put it away in public.  Especially in a restaurant, at the movies, or while speaking with another human being.  You are not a rude person; do not allow the iPhone to change that.

12.  Do not send or receive pictures of your private parts or anyone else's private parts.  Don't laugh.  Someday you will be tempted to do this despite your high intelligence.  It is risky and could ruin your teenage/college/adult life.  It is always a bad idea.  Cyberspace is vast and more powerful than you.  And it is hard to make anything of this magnitude disappear – including a bad reputation.

13.  Don't take a zillion pictures and videos.  There is no need to document everything.  Live your experiences.  They will be stored in your memory for eternity.

14.  Leave your phone home sometimes and feel safe and secure in that decision.  It is not alive or an extension of you.  Learn to live without it.  Be bigger and more powerful than FOMO – fear of missing out. 

15.  Download music that is new or classic or different than the millions of your peers that listen to the same exact stuff.  Your generation has access to music like never before in history.  Take advantage of that gift.  Expand your horizons.

16.  Play a game with words or puzzles or brain teasers every now and then.

17.  Keep your eyes up.  See the world happening around you.  Stare out a window.  Listen to the birds.  Take a walk.  Talk to a stranger.  Wonder without googling. 

18.  You will mess up.  I will take away your phone.  We will sit down and talk about it.  We will start over again.  You & I, we are always learning.  I am on your team.  We are in this together.

It is my hope that you can agree to these terms.  Most of the lessons listed here do not just apply to the iPhone, but to life.  You are growing up in a fast and ever changing world.  It is exciting and enticing. Keep it simple every chance you get.  Trust your powerful mind and giant heart above any machine.  I love you.  I hope you enjoy your awesome new iPhone.  Merry Christmas!

 xoxoxo

Mom

Dear Jeshua

Thanks for using us and Lolo Teng's car to be a blessing to others. Maybe you can bless us with a new (and bigger) vehicle in 2013 so we can bless others more often? :)

Love you, Papa Jesus! Amen!

Happy New Year!

2012 was full of memorable events, don't you think so?

- Iya was born a day before mommy's birthday, after a month of infanticipating coz she seemed ready to pop out anytime
- Good performance feedback for mom despite me missing a lot of days of work, and messing up on some days too.
- Lolo Romy's death. I'm pretty sure he and Lola Dely are happy in heaven.
- Daddy's GBS and the three-week trial in the hospital. I really thought we'd lose daddy, but thank God that He has made daddy well. :)
- Daddy's promotion. Got the news while he was still in the hospital, too! :)
- Kuya Aki's brush with dengue. I really thank God for your strength, Kuya. Imagine having dengue yet not needing hospital confinement. I wouldn't know what to do or how to split myself if you got confined while daddy was still recuperating.
- The cancelled wedding. We prepared for it for almost a year, but God wanted mom and dad to have a stronger marriage, rather than a grand wedding. Thankful that we got a church blessing nevertheless. :)

It was a year full of trials, tears, laughter and memories, and I can't wait to start 2013 with all of you. I love you so much!