Achievement Unlocked: Single Mom (Part 5)

They say battered wives get brainwashed that they seem to think that the cycle of abuse is what is norm. They say battered wives almost seem to depend on their abuser, and "look for" the abuse since they feel it is normal and should be tolerated.

I disagree.

Women who stay in abusive relationships are neither weak, dependent or brainwashed. They are courageous, loving and selfless. It is easy to prepare a "flight plan" -- where to go and what are the next steps when they decide to leave their abuser. BUT, when they consider other family members that might get hurt when the abuser runs amuck, they decide to stay. They stay and swallow their pride so that others may be safe. They pray for protection and take all the pain so that a others may be spared.

In the end, no one would rather sleep on the floor by the door, all the while thinking about how she stayed by her abuser's side during the days when he can barely breathe. And while he throws pillows at her, she keeps her position on the floor so that he cannot take their kids away in the middle of the night. Then to be "forgiven" through reconciliation sex a few days after. Months after, they discover she is pregnant again, and she thanks God that nothing bad has happened to the child in her womb during that gruelling night.

TO PART 6.

Achievement Unlocked: Single Mom (Part 4)

I opened the door to our room and, with no words, got I. Dad threw the stick he was hitting I with across the room as I went out.

I consoled I and gave her water to soothe her throat. We sat down on the wooden sala set as I was determined to sleep there with I. I knew an outburst is brewing.

I wasn't mistaken. A few minutes after, Dad got out and started berrating me. Does he interfere when I discipline you? No. Is he of no value to the household? I said no. He said I was always right, I was always making the decisions. It went on and on and on. I realized I already fell asleep in my arms, poor thing. She must have been tired from all the crying.

M and A went out of the room a few minutes after Dad and they heard a lot of the fighting and almost-shouting. I half-expected lolo and lola to come out, thankfully they didn't.

TO PART 5.

Achievement Unlocked: Single Mom (Part 3)

I know he will get angry if I interfered. This has happened a number of times already, always with I. I hate the cycle - him scaring I, I getting scared and crying, he berrates I for crying and scaring her even more. The cycle continues.

I tried to give Dad space and let him discipline I. But I had been crying for half an hour already, pleading and saying sorry. Dad doesn't listen and insists that saying sorry doesn't mean that all will immediately be well. I do not know how he envisions the night to stop.

If I stay in the room, I might think that I am not defending her. If I leave her, she might think I am abandoning her. But I couldn't stay and listen to her begging and saying sorry to Dad. I left the room and tried to calm down.

Finally, I could not take it any more. I started towards our room. I saw lola extending her hand from the door of their room, towards ours. I know she was praying over Dad. She could have just prayed in their room. Did it really sound that bad that she felt she had to physically come closer and extend her hand so that her prayers may be heard?

TO PART 4